Reason Injects with Venom and Eats Self

by jerrontables

We didn’t like the ruling,

So we did it all our own.

We traded off our sturdibles

For sex and Toblerones.

We poke our ragged banners in

Our mountains to atone,

Flip on the ol’ Carcrashians,

And never feel alone.


We whiten all our teeth but we

For never brush and floss–

“Wait wait wait wait

You’re not to speak that way to me

I’m Adam, I’m the boss.

With all my range of movement

I’m not sure where you get off.

I sell you all the best of things

At well below the cost:

You see here all my snowledges

Spit shined in semigloss?”


Oh, Adam, all your snowledges

Are splatters on the stall

The size of mere bacterium

Yay microscopic tall.

“I do not care–you’ve seen my wares–

I’m Adam of them All!

If you like not my precious things

Then get out of my mall!”


We all, we all shall leave your mall

In bad health and good time–

In best of shape, if we should leave

Without spending a dime.